These Days
by Stephane Richer
Summary: These days I sit on corner stones and count the time in quarter tones to ten.


These Days

Disclaimer: I don't own Fountain's of Wayne's recording of "These Days" or JK Rowling's _Harry Potter_ series.

* * *

The days are long; the castle is slowly being rebuilt. Dean has been given an option to return, to complete his seventh year, to make up for being on the run. They're not pressuring him to return, though, and he's got time to make his decision. Honestly, it would be too weird to return to Hogwarts, too difficult to go back now. He's been able to survive on his own, and he can't really go back. Everyone will be scared, changed, matured. But Hogwarts can do nothing for him now.

But what are his other options? He can't work for the government, the same government that forced him to go on the run and grow up too fast in the first place. This government allowed itself to be taken over by these maniacs who went around killing and locking up people, like something he'd read in a history book and could not believe would ever happen in his lifetime.

Ginny's back with Harry, and it's probably all for the best. Ron's actually okay with their relationship, and honestly losing Ron wouldn't have been worth staying with Ginny. Still, he misses her. He often thought of her on the run, wondered how she was holding up, if she was back at Hogwarts or on the run, too. If she was safe. Perhaps he'll find another woman someday. He hopes he will but if there's one thing this war taught him it was that there are some things that he can't prepare for. The future is all wide open spaces and full of unknowns.

And even his magical skills, skills that he's trained and practiced over and over, can become useless or obsolete. There will always be someone more powerful, brave, and clever than he. The world is wide open, yes, but to say that of the wizarding world would be oxymoronic. He cannot prove his wizarding blood; discrimination has not been eliminated. Harry Potter is a halfblood hero, but the new government is full of the same old families and the people who know people who know people. He doesn't doubt people like Hermione and Justin can make it, but he doubts himself.

More than Ginny, more than a roof over his head or running water, he missed his family when he was on the run. This summer is the last before his friends at home will go off to university. He's too late to apply, but he can take a year off, go abroad. The government, as much as he resents it, can get him good papers that will transfer over to the muggle world.

He goes to McGonagall's office, and even though she's busy she's still got time for him. She tells him he was always promising and bright and especially now with the rising death toll, they can use people like him. But it is his choice, and she respects it and knows he's thought about it. She says she'll contact the Ministry for him and thanks him for helping with the castle renovations, and if he ever reconsiders he can always talk to her. He thanks her in return.

"You know…for everything, Professor. If I could go back and do it all again, I would."

After all, as an eleven-year-old he was beyond thrilled. He'd always been different, and now maybe there was some place he could fit into. He made friends and enemies, learned so much, became part of a world beyond anything he could have ever dreamed. But now he's had enough. He can look back on everything, can take a step away from it. He wants to take a step away from it, to be able to discuss football and local politics with his friends and not have to worry about broader implications that could shatter the UK or even the world.

Maybe he'll come back. At the very least, he'll be in touch with Seamus. He doesn't like Dean's decision, and takes a while to come around, but then he always does. He wouldn't be Seamus if he wasn't like that. Even now, after everything has happened, he is still the same. It's comforting, to lift every brick back into place, using their hands (using magic on a place so inherently magical seems like sacrilege) and levitating themselves into the sky as the castle reaches new heights. It's comforting, to sit by the lake together and reminisce or just to lie in silence.

They all seem to gravitate toward old house affiliations, and the first thing they rebuild is the great hall, though all four familiar house tables have remained intact. He eats lunch every day near Percy, Hermione, Seamus, and Katie, and it's like he's a first year all over again, but their paths are all diverging instead of converging. Little by little, everyone leaves as Hogwarts becomes almost like Hogwarts again. Katie is a sports reporter for the Daily Prophet; Percy is still some kind of undersecretary; Harry, Ron, and Neville are becoming aurors; Lee is setting up a new radio station.

Finally, the last brick is laid. New enchantments have to be cast, but that only takes a few days. Dean murmurs the spells reverently. He won't be needing them for a while.

McGonagall has written him a glowing letter of recommendation for a university in Canada, and he is surprisingly accepted. He has to pay the international tuition, but the war compensation will cover the first year or so and he might be able to apply for a scholarship. He'll worry about that part when he gets there.

Saying goodbye to Seamus is hard, but "it's really only temporary," he says. "We spent a year apart before; we can do it again." The owl with his first letter shows up to his school dormitory before he does. He wonders how he'll be explain this to his muggle roommate, but maybe the owl will know to hide from muggles.

But a chapter in the book of his life has slammed shut, and he's ready for a new one.


End file.
